Good posts, James James
I have personally known several people who commited suicide. You don't always see it coming. People store up stuff and don't want to talk about it. I will talk about two of those I knew and it hurts me to do so. I have discussed neither before.
Liam
Liam was a guy I met in a short lived restaurant enterprise in Belfast. He was from the north coast. He was a dishwasher, like me. He was about 20, I was 17. People didn't warm to him for reasons unknown to me. I think it was the fact he was big, over six feet tall and spoke with a gruff north Antrim accent. He always wore the same great big overcoat and a cap; he looked a bit like Casey Jones. In many respects, he was older than his years. He was lonely as hell in Belfast as he grew up in a country village. I used to bring him back to mine and we'd sit and chat and laugh over a few drinks into the wee small hours, then he would crash out on the sofa and his snoring would keep me awake all night. What I found about Liam is that he was a very honest and decent guy beneath the gruff demeanour. He had a bit of a crazy side where he would literally steal a bus and drive home and park it outside his front door and go to sleep as if nothing had happened. I think he wanted to be wanted. He wrote to me a week before he ended his life. He gave no indication that he was suicidal. He said he was 'okay'.
Alison
I met Alison at work. She was a client. She was 27 yrs old and a former model. A stunning looking girl, albeit anorexic. I used to take clients to a free-to-enter comedy club and she always came along. Alison was a graduate and from a wealthy background. There were associative issues. Alison moved on but wrote to me shortly before her suicide and pleaded with me to contact her. I spoke to my halfwit manager at the time who said: that would not be appropriate. ( despite Alison saying she was lesbian, which I stated) To my eternal shame I didn't contact her.
One week later I learned she ended her life.
God Bless Liam and Alison. RIP.
Danny.
Danny came from a big family, the 3rd youngest of 11. He went to grammar school and University. Much more intelligent than me and could pull the woman at the drop of a hat.
He always reminded me of Jim Morrison of the doors. We listened to the Doors amongst others, before hitting the local bars.
He had a free and easy spirit... and an infectious laugh.
Danny hooked up with a girl in Glasgow for a few years, split up with her, came home and put a vacuum hose onto a car exhaust, the other end in the car window....Outside the family home.
I still haven't worked out Danny's thought process. Rip. Don't suspect I ever could.
Julie.
On a more cheerful note.
My daughters 17yr old friend Julie, is slowly on the mend after taking an overdose in November. Taking an overdose over a boyfriend, at 17yrs old.
Julie received 7 A's 3 B's in her recent GCSE's. She's a smart kid.
She is on the mend, and gradually getting back to school. 2 days a week atm.
I met Julie over Christmas and was thinking how lucky someone found her quickly and phoned an ambulance. Every day a bonus for her now.
What thought process to drive her to take 30 tablets at one go ?? Did she understand fully the consequences ?
I don't think she even knows herself.