Author Topic: Is this elderly abuse?  (Read 655 times)

OJGrehan

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Is this elderly abuse?
« on: July 09, 2019, 08:14:39 PM »
I am hoping I can get some advice regarding an incident that happened to an elderly woman I know, where she was badly mistreated and wrongfully accused of stealing by a prominent shopping store from which she received a permanent ban from the store including a minimum of a year ban from the shopping centre for forgetting to pay for two bonnets of strawberries, which to me seems extremely harsh never mind the fact she was wrongfully accused.
Last week after finishing and paying for her weekly shopping, she decided to return to the store in question to buy some strawberries, she recalls putting the bonnets of strawberries in the shopping trolley on top of her previously paid for items and not in the store shopping bags, after being distracted by looking at other items she left the store forgetting to pay for the strawberries, when the store security approached her, she was extremely embarrassed and apologetic, tried to explain what had happened, only for her explanation to fall on deaf ears, she was then forcefully escorted to a security room in the store, at which point tried to explain again what had happen, she was advised by the overzealous in my opinion security guard that a store manager would arrive shortly to discuss the matter with her, when eventually the store manager arrived and yet again the women explained as to what had actually happened, she received no common decency, understanding or acceptance of the truth to what had happen, taking into consideration the elderly women is 73yrs old and sometimes forgetful (although forgetfulness is something that happens to us all at some stage and reason) and also on strong painkiller medication (Co-codamol) had simply forgot to pay for the items.
The whole thing has left her extremely distressed to say the least, I have known the woman for many years and know that stealing is something she just simply would not do and is a god-fearing woman. Am I delusional in thinking that a store manager has the skill set to deal with such matters correctly, to show some discretion and common decency in dealing with such matters? I would fully understand if the woman had previously left the store without paying for items in the 30 years, she has been shopping at the shopping centre or had been previously convicted of theft. It just seems to me to be an abuse of an elderly womanís lack of ability to stand up for herself due to shock and her current state of health.
Any advice or comments will be gratefully received.

Billy Fish

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Re: Is this elderly abuse?
« Reply #1 on: July 09, 2019, 08:18:21 PM »
See a solicitor.  The first consultation is usually free of charge. :)
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James James

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Re: Is this elderly abuse?
« Reply #2 on: July 09, 2019, 08:48:55 PM »
Solid blocks of text without spacing are very difficult to read, and especially so if any readers have visual problems.

So I've edited your text to make it a bit easier to read,... pressing your enter key when you're writing a message will create some line spacing, but it won't post the message.

Did this incident happen in Belfast. ?

BTW,... shop staff have no legal power to "forcefully" make anyone go anywhere, for any reason,... nor do they have any legal power to detain them or to search them or their belongings.

If they do so, without first making a citizens arrest, and then calling the police to deal with the matter, they will have committed one or more legal offences.

Regardless of that, and at present, and at a minimum, you should contact the store's head office, and make a formal complaint to them.



Age UK Northern Ireland might be able to give you some helpful advice,... and they might even take up the matter with the store  on her behalf.

https://www.ageuk.org.uk/northern-ireland/information-advice/

https://www.ageuk.org.uk/northern-ireland/contact-us/
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I am hoping I can get some advice regarding an incident that happened to an elderly woman I know, where she was badly mistreated and wrongfully accused of stealing by a prominent shopping store from which she received a permanent ban from the store.

Including a minimum of a year ban from the shopping centre for forgetting to pay for two bonnets of strawberries, which to me seems extremely harsh never mind the fact she was wrongfully accused.

Last week after finishing and paying for her weekly shopping, she decided to return to the store in question to buy some strawberries.

She recalls putting the bonnets of strawberries in the shopping trolley on top of her previously paid for items and not in the store shopping bags.

After being distracted by looking at other items she left the store forgetting to pay for the strawberries.

When the store security approached her, she was extremely embarrassed and apologetic, tried to explain what had happened, only for her explanation to fall on deaf ears, she was then forcefully escorted to a security room in the store.

At which point she tried to explain again what had happen, she was advised by the overzealous, in my opinion, security guard that a store manager would arrive shortly to discuss the matter with her.

When eventually the store manager arrived and yet again the women explained as to what had actually happened, she received no common decency, understanding or acceptance of the truth to what had happen.

Taking into consideration the elderly women is 73yrs old and sometimes forgetful (although forgetfulness is something that happens to us all at some stage and reason) and also on strong painkiller medication (Co-codamol) and had simply forgot to pay for the items.

The whole thing has left her extremely distressed to say the least.

I have known the woman for many years and know that stealing is something she just simply would not do and is a god-fearing woman.

Am I delusional in thinking that a store manager has the skill set to deal with such matters correctly, to show some discretion and common decency in dealing with such matters. ?

I would fully understand if the woman had previously left the store without paying for items in the 30 years, she has been shopping at the shopping centre or had been previously convicted of theft.

It just seems to me to be an abuse of an elderly womanís lack of ability to stand up for herself due to shock and her current state of health.

Any advice or comments will gratefully received.

bjay

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Re: Is this elderly abuse?
« Reply #3 on: July 09, 2019, 09:13:43 PM »
Take the issue up with an MLA or MP who can write to the relevant parties on her behalf.  The Equality Commission can give advice for free over the telephone. It is regrettable as we get older we become more forgetful and do things we would not have done in earlier years.

White dee

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Re: Is this elderly abuse?
« Reply #4 on: July 09, 2019, 09:26:18 PM »
I am hoping I can get some advice regarding an incident that happened to an elderly woman I know, where she was badly mistreated and wrongfully accused of stealing by a prominent shopping store from which she received a permanent ban from the store including a minimum of a year ban from the shopping centre for forgetting to pay for two bonnets of strawberries, which to me seems extremely harsh never mind the fact she was wrongfully accused.
Last week after finishing and paying for her weekly shopping, she decided to return to the store in question to buy some strawberries, she recalls putting the bonnets of strawberries in the shopping trolley on top of her previously paid for items and not in the store shopping bags, after being distracted by looking at other items she left the store forgetting to pay for the strawberries, when the store security approached her, she was extremely embarrassed and apologetic, tried to explain what had happened, only for her explanation to fall on deaf ears, she was then forcefully escorted to a security room in the store, at which point tried to explain again what had happen, she was advised by the overzealous in my opinion security guard that a store manager would arrive shortly to discuss the matter with her, when eventually the store manager arrived and yet again the women explained as to what had actually happened, she received no common decency, understanding or acceptance of the truth to what had happen, taking into consideration the elderly women is 73yrs old and sometimes forgetful (although forgetfulness is something that happens to us all at some stage and reason) and also on strong painkiller medication (Co-codamol) had simply forgot to pay for the items.
The whole thing has left her extremely distressed to say the least, I have known the woman for many years and know that stealing is something she just simply would not do and is a god-fearing woman. Am I delusional in thinking that a store manager has the skill set to deal with such matters correctly, to show some discretion and common decency in dealing with such matters? I would fully understand if the woman had previously left the store without paying for items in the 30 years, she has been shopping at the shopping centre or had been previously convicted of theft. It just seems to me to be an abuse of an elderly womanís lack of ability to stand up for herself due to shock and her current state of health.
Any advice or comments will be gratefully received.

Wow that seems very harsh provided it was Her first such incident,what next, off to some
Colony Island,you should consider reply #1 and #2 to start with, I wish you luck on Her
behalf, this is so wrong.

Justice for all the innocent/ unarmed People who were
Gunned down by the British Soldiers,
For no other reason then their religion,were murdered.

James James

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Re: Is this elderly abuse?
« Reply #5 on: July 10, 2019, 08:42:27 AM »
See a solicitor.  The first consultation is usually free of charge.
https://www.lawcentreni.org/


jillyfred

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Re: Is this elderly abuse?
« Reply #6 on: July 10, 2019, 12:29:48 PM »
See a solicitor.  The first consultation is usually free of charge. :)

===
Good advice Billy.

I would also suggest the Citizens Advice Bureau to the Lady as their advice and assistance is completely free.

jilly

Bigali

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Re: Is this elderly abuse?
« Reply #7 on: July 10, 2019, 12:37:35 PM »
Iím not entirely sure of the authenticity of the original post  ???
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White dee

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Justice for all the innocent/ unarmed People who were
Gunned down by the British Soldiers,
For no other reason then their religion,were murdered.

CMcG

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Re: Is this elderly abuse?
« Reply #9 on: July 10, 2019, 05:25:25 PM »
OJGrehan,

Can you provide any other online references?  Thank you so much in anticipation.


bjay

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Re: Is this elderly abuse?
« Reply #10 on: July 10, 2019, 09:01:50 PM »
COPNI - Commisioner for Older People NI

White dee

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Re: Is this elderly abuse?
« Reply #11 on: July 11, 2019, 12:55:34 AM »
Iím not entirely sure of the authenticity of the original post  ???

You cud be right on that Ali, we do get very strange posts on here,( some times )
Justice for all the innocent/ unarmed People who were
Gunned down by the British Soldiers,
For no other reason then their religion,were murdered.

James James

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Re: Is this elderly abuse?
« Reply #12 on: July 11, 2019, 09:05:39 AM »
Iím not entirely sure of the authenticity of the original post  ???
Neither am I, and it seems very odd that if it was genuine the thread starter didn't log on again and made no further comment. Nevertheless though, it has provided some useful sources for anyone else who might be involved in similar situations in Belfast or Northern Ireland.

James James

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Re: Is this elderly abuse?
« Reply #13 on: July 11, 2019, 09:07:34 AM »

derdrei

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Re: Is this elderly abuse?
« Reply #14 on: July 11, 2019, 09:21:46 AM »
Wow that seems very harsh provided it was Her first such incident,what next, off to some
Colony Island,you should consider reply #1 and #2 to start with, I wish you luck on Her
behalf, this is so wrong.
it seams to be a bit sad like a mistake .